9-15-2011
Dear Diary,
I think I’ve met someone! He’s really sweet. He’s been sending me about 10 messages a day since the beginning of September and sometimes even more. His username is Chenhong17. When I opened his first message it had some interesting characters in it. I think it’ was code for hey beautiful, what’s your name or something like that. Initially I wasnt buying all the messages but as days went on his messages kept coming and I figure he must’ve been very interested in me. What can I say?… I really do admire a man with persistence. I think he lives in Hong Kong, which isn’t too bad. Maybe we can web chat or facetime…I’m going to check and see if he has an iPhone. Maybe we can even meet up somewhere in Europe…..
9-22-2011
I got this message from Julia with a username kissmeimcute today. She says she is 26 and looking for a good time. She even sent some photos of herself of which I haven’t had a chance to look at. Her message says that she wants a boyfriend and wants to start a big friendship. She also said that March is the best time for this. I was thinking…. if March is the best time for this then why are you sending this email in September??? Maybe she just wants to get an early start on things. Maybe I should hook her up with my single guy friend, Tyrone. I had lunch with him yesterday and he just got out of a 3month relationship. She seems like such a free spirit. I’m going to forward him her link to see what he thinks.
By the way today wasn’t a good day on the lovefront for me….I think my new guy Chenghong 17 was a cheat. I started looking at his repeated messages and realized he may be seeing other people including a couple of my friends. His special messages that I thought were only just for me had 7 other email addresses on them. Well at least I tried…I think I’ll go watch a new movie tonight and use the coupon I got from Fandago FanMail.
9-23-11
The most embarrassing thing happened to me today. I was reviewing my email at work today and then I opened this email that said something about a sale. When I opened the email the first line starts off in big bold letters saying , “Max Gentleman Enlargement Pills”. Before I could close the email, my older male boss walks up peering at my screen . Needless to say he walked away with a look of surprise and embarrassment after he got a glimpse of my screen. I tried to orchestrate a cover up of the screen by repositioning my body, but I’m sure he could still read the bold letters that read, ‘Male Enlargement Pills’. I don’t think that was quite the sale I was looking for….
Nevertheless it seems like things are getting serious between my friend Tyrone and the new girl Julia. He said the photos were rare and none like he had ever seen before…I guess it’s a match!
9-25-2011
Dear Diary,
Today is the best day ever! In addition to getting a message from this new guy, username princebolkiah1…Oh wow what if he’s a real prince! I just found out that I may become a millionaire!!! I got this memo via email from a bank consultant in London at some ADB Banks…not sure who that is. However, his message says that since an investor died and left $7 million in a bank account and because we have the same last name, I can accept the in heritance as soon as I verify a couple of details.
I was at dinner with friend when I got the message. I screamed I’m rich! I’m rich! I’m really really reach rich! I never thought in a million years that I could open an email and instantly be rich. I still need to call my mom and tell her the news to see if she’s heard anything about a distant relative passing on and leaving some money. I’m thinking maybe I should keep it a secret for a little while until I get the money?
First things first, I’m going to check to see what time it is in London and call this Mr. Watts to see if I can get my information to him in order to expediate expedite things. As soon as I get the money I’m going on a shopping spree, buying a new car, new house, pay off student loans….Thank God I’m a Moss…LOL!
Tags: First Draft

